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Showing posts from November, 2020

Stranger, intruder, or impostor?

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Everyone was waving and exchanging greetings and talking, as if they were in a club where people are glad to find themselves among others from the same world. That is how I explained to myself the strange impression I had of being odd man out, a kind of intruder.   Ever played Among Us? This addicting game is a fun game my friends and I play as a break between the work we have to do. What's funny though is that when I was reading The Stranger , specifically the quote above, I made the connection of Mersault feeling like an "intruder" to this new, popular concept of impostor in Among Us. Mersault comes to this realization when he notices everyone conversing, happy to see each other. It's funny as he just explains to himself that he's the odd one out, as we all know that he's clearly the odd one out since the beginning with his passivity toward life (oddily enough, this is a significant factor toward his trial decision).  As I read Mersault's story, especial

It's not you, nor is it fate

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One of my takeaways from this week's Socratic Seminar is our tendency to make excuses toward external factors rather than the actual internal factors. We are avoiding the real issue at hand: ourselves. Any outcome that didn't go Oedipus's way was attributed to fate. Although there was a prophecy tied to his name, hubris was the main cause of his problems. This made me wonder, how often do I attribute my shortcomings to factors I can't control? And vise versa, how often do I attribute my shortcomings to myself when they're actually uncontrollable? I'm indecisive and pretty sensitive (it sucks), so I normally think unfavorable solutions are my fault, or at least partially. Throughout high school, this college app season, and quarter 1's complex identity unit, I've begun to explore who I am and what makes me happy. In the summer, I had a severe identity crisis—feeling like a jack of all trades, master of none. Everything I did seemed to have no substance, j

How to Find Your Thick & Fluffy Waffle

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 “It is wrong to have an ideal view of the world. That’s where the mischief starts. That’s where everything starts unravelling.” —V. S. Naipaul, Magic Seeds  Going into high school, I held an idealistic view of the high school world, setting a roadmap for my courses and extracurriculars. Cleaning my room today, I found that paper with all my plans. Needless to say - they didn't happen. For each February when we picked our courses, I had a major dilemma between what I wanted to pick versus what I had planned, and also what my peers. Upon seeing this quote last week, I felt that it accurately represented my annual February class selection stress - the ideal view of what I had to be and what I had to select unraveled all of my fears.  Potentially this stems from my indecisiveness: confusion over what I want to do in the future and hope to appease others like my parents, counselors, and peers. Looking back at these last few Februarys that I don't have to go through this year, I